Crematorium Power Plant

Dead people. Please. I’m tired of hearing about them. Day in and day out it’s always the same: he’s dead, she’s dead, 50 just died over here. I get it. They’re dead. Let’s just get rid of those gross corpses.

Here’s an idea: create centralized crematoriums outside all major metropolitan areas. Outfit each facility with a steam-generator to turn the burning-corpse energy into clean, renewable energy. It could be called the gray revolution.

Dead people are an untapped resource that the average person’s moral obligations prevent them from noticing. There is no real demand for dead people, but an unlimited supply. Like Ford cars.

Filed under: Amoral Energy Generation

updated 01/09: new thoughts on this: awesome idea. Trying too hard to be funny, and failing, but I was just thinking about this the other day. If you’re goin’ up in a ball of fire, why not boil some water and turn a turbine while you’re at it, you selfish jerk?

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