Invention: Lefty Pen

November 29th, 2006

Every Lefty knows that writing in English was invented by a Righty.  Righties probably wonder why Lefty handwriting tends to look terrible, and why Lefties always look awkward and lame while using a writing implement.

Here’s how writing works, for the preschoolers reading this: you hold a pencil (or crayon or sidewalk chalk) in your right hand, and pull your arm to the right, away from you, towards the end of a line.  Repeat until all lines are full and the teacher hands you a new page.  Yeah, sounds great – if you’re a Righty.  Because of Righty-bias, Lefties have to push the pencil towards the right – their hand covering what they’re writing the whole time.  Thus Lefties are in a continuous fog.

Get it?  Righties pull, Lefties push.  It’s hard to explain exactly why this means that Lefty handwriting has to look stupid, but it does.  If, however, Lefties could start on the right side of a page, and write towards the left, then Lefty writing would be beautiful and flawless.  That’s never going to happen because everyone would need a mirror to read Lefty handwriting.

Most Lefties have also had the experience of ball-point pens getting screwed-up.  The classic black Uni Ball pen is a good example of this.  A Lefty can use one of these pens for a little while, but eventually all of that pushing-motion scrapes up paper and dirties up the ball-rolling thing, or something.  I don’t really know exactly what’s going on, but it’s a serious problem that needs a remedy.

Hence: Lefty Pen

Lefty Pen

Shown at the angle a Lefty would be using it – the idea here is that the ball-point hits the surface the way it would if a Righty were using a regular pen.

5 Responses to “Invention: Lefty Pen”

  1. Steal My Ideas, Please » ‘Steal My Ideas’ Stolen?! on June 3, 2007 12:06 pm

    […] Steal My Ideas: It’s Like I Rubbed My Brain All Over This Thing: Paul Bertino’s brain rubbings include some evolving Jesus mystery painting (Jesus as the Grim Reaper?), a Captive Soda Straw (good idea, drawing captures it nicely), two weightless backpacks (the first is funny with a fan-umbrella gizmo), and a Lefty Pen, which I’m surprised never occurred in any way to me, since I too’m a lefty. […]

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