Invention: The Totally High Carry-all (THC)

January 5th, 2007

Now a special treat for my loyal, but generally silent, readers:

Everyone knows that backpacks can be cumbersome, uncomfortable, dorky, and when fully-loaded, too heavy. Really, carrying stuff around is a pain in the ass, and you know it. That is why they invented pack-animals and Sherpas.

The problem with backpacks stems from the fact that very few advancements have been made in toting-technology, for like a 1,000 years – with 2 noteworthy exceptions. One is the fanny pack, which is innovative in the way it shifts the weight-bearing from the shoulders to the waist. Unfortunately, there is no way to style a fanny-pack to make the wearer look like anything but a total douche. The other ‘advancement’ in lugging stuff around is apparently the wheel, which is like a square but with very rounded corners. Your toes have probably been the target of a backpack-on-wheels on more than one occasion.

If I have my way, the future of backpacknology will totally blow your mind.

To illustrate my incredible backpack inventions, I’ve commissioned the illustrating muscle of Forrest Schell. All of the ideas are mine mine mine.

#1 Totally High Carry-all


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